Sometimes you just need comfort food. Today was one of those days. Actually, many days lately have been one of those days. I've been really needing to cloak myself in a big, enveloping comfort food hug.
You see, I lost my job last year. A job I loved, working for a company I believed in, where I was successful and well respected. You know, a rarity! I'd only been with the company for a few short months but had already been promoted, was an integral member of the CEO's management team and had forged some really great friendships. I was, dare I say it, happy. Wait...what? She's happy? Cue disaster. Get misery and depression on the phone, we need them on stand-by. And so, on that balmy Monday afternoon in mid-July, when disaster apparently had nothing better to do, it all came tumbling down.
I suppose, if you're the kind of person who believes in signs, you may have seen this coming. What began as a sunny morning commute foretold what was to come when no sooner did I set foot out of the car in the office parking lot than the sky took on an ominous shade of gray. Every trace of blue vanished and clouds rolled in as I walked into the building, down the hall and towards my office. Plunging the key into the lock on my office door, I turned the handle in synchronicity with the first thunderclap. The skies opened up and rain pelted my office window, hard. I gazed outside as my computer booted up, too distracted by the cacophony of the storm to notice the prescient text message that had arrived from my closest work friend. "Whatever happens today, I love you Jour and am glad you are a part of my life.". Concerned, I frantically dialed Jessica's number. Voicemail, damn.
Moments later she came sweeping into my office with breaking news, a look of despair on her face. The CEO's daughter, she had information about events that had transpired over the weekend, and behind closed doors, with teary eyes, we talked about the impending death of our beloved corporation. Long story short, we were forced into a chapter 7 bankruptcy by lenders and private equities firms who saw us as a write off. The livelihood of close to 100 dedicated employees reduced to little more than black numbers on a white page. The shades of gray lie in the bewildered glances exchanged. In the line of former employees sitting on the curb, boxes holding months and years of their professionals lives next to them, wondering how to get home to loved ones who were hours, if not many states away, when our company cars were no longer company property. In the farewell hugs and the abundance tears. In the taxed looks on the faces of people who were, simply, a tax write off.
That evening was one of the hardest nights of my life. I couldn't take phone calls from concerned friends and family because I couldn't stop crying long enough to talk. I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. Hell, I could barely catch my breath. That was 9 months and countless emailed resumes ago. In this time, I've gotten, if I'm being generous, maybe 10 responses. Most emails get ignored leading me to believe that the digital age has done little more than give us yet another medium with which to be rude. Phone calls go unanswered, messages unreturned and the couple of recruiters I've actually spoken with have been kind enough to make the decision for me that either a) the commute was too far or b) the pay was too low. Head, wall, I believe you 2 have met. Bang, bang bang.
I had my first interview since being laid off last week. If you ask me, if went really well; I'm perfectly qualified, they didn't blink at my salary requirements, the owner and I are both dog lovers (his Jack Russell even spends time in the office). Yet, here it is, a week later and...nothing. Obviously, there are good days and bad and I know things will eventually change, but I'm just not feeling the love on the job front. So, you know that feeling of love that comes from having a belly full of homemade comfort food? The kind that takes you in, wraps you up and makes you feel like a happy, protected 5 year old? That is what I needed (albeit with slightly fewer calories)!
I had my first interview since being laid off last week. If you ask me, if went really well; I'm perfectly qualified, they didn't blink at my salary requirements, the owner and I are both dog lovers (his Jack Russell even spends time in the office). Yet, here it is, a week later and...nothing. Obviously, there are good days and bad and I know things will eventually change, but I'm just not feeling the love on the job front. So, you know that feeling of love that comes from having a belly full of homemade comfort food? The kind that takes you in, wraps you up and makes you feel like a happy, protected 5 year old? That is what I needed (albeit with slightly fewer calories)!
